A Dear Friend and Colleague - T.N.Vasumathi

April 1^st 2015, I lost a dear friend and colleague TN Vasumathi . I feel very sad and lost in her passing away. Was she  such a close friend to me - not exactly . I had known  her for the last ten years – she  was a good colleague who sincerely clarified my queries  and questions whenever I  approached her  without any hesitation. I consider myself a sincere worker but my sincerity is limited to my area of work and when  I don’t have any work I indulge myself in my various interests. Vasumathi was very unlike me - to her we come to office to work and work is the only thing that should be done during  office hours. After having spent four years in a particular section , I remember  having met her one early morning and told her “Madam  why don’t you seek a change . come join me in my section it will be a chance  to do a different  job and  we  will be able to manage things without any problems” .

She said “inspite of being long overdue for a shift ,nobody considers me for a change -  I had met the head of office 2 consecutive  years ,I have become like  fixture in this section and feeling bored. But,  I do not  intend to beg.”  After much difficulty, and efforts of one of her senior officer and very much as per my wish she joined my office and my section in 2012. Since then till the last day at office not a single day had passed without her greeting  “Good Morning Prema” . Those were always the first word she uttered on entering our room. Though we were not in the same section during the last one and half  years there never was a change in her treatment of me . she always used to come and share her thoughts, feelings and ideas  related to work or other wise . If she found me missing her early morning wish she would make special efforts to come and see if I have come to office. . What was so special about TNV is a question some might consider ? She was not only special but exemplary . I have never seen her in her youth and  but saw a photograph of her  when she joined the department in 1983 . She was smart and beautiful young girl  her intelligence was writ large on her face. She once confided in me that she had few hormonal issues for  which she was not treated properly and suddenly started developing severe headaches .She then consulted the leading neurologist of those days who diagnosed that she had a tumor in her pituitary gland and the same needs to be removed .

She underwent two major surgeries- one carried out erroneously other to rectify the same- and both were done by  opening her skull . Most of her gland  had to be removed she was then told that she would not be fit for a family life but TNV said it did not bother her too much  .To her it was a health complication resolved . A lesser person would have been depressed and sad at the kind of complication she had to face and problems encountered on daily basis, but to her her issue had been solved and had to be taken care of that is all .She was a spirited woman to whom it was one another problem to be overcome.  She refused to be an object of pity and despair and continued her days . During the course of her life she developed a lot of health complications including diabetes  and hypertension. Every day before leaving for office she had to take 10 tablets  for a problem free day but these were just a matter of  routine and not a cause of self pity ,sympathy seeking or depression - they were isuues which were to be dealt with  in a matter of fact way - rather than being made a  major issue. She had a great fondness for sweets ,good food ,saries and jewelleries . Never did a vendor visit our section and go without selling to her for at least Rs. 100 to her. She never treated any person in a deprecating manner. She was a strong willed and intelligent with excellent memory and a lot of empathy in her.

She was a person who scrupulously  maintained registers containing all changes / in budgets ,indirect taxes which was required for  our official work.She was an ardent fan of  “ The Hindu  Graffiti and health capsule” . She hated psycophants and artificial people and was vociferous in her complaints about them. She had excellent sense of wit an humor. Her  code of ethics and principles were unmatchable and she was lavish in her appreciation too. Though a devout person she abhorred practice of religion at office/work place.  To her office is a place to work.  Temple for prayer.  Similarly she was truly secular in the sense she never liked performance of  pooja etc. in a Governmnent office where she felt that people of all belief worked  and it was not fair to practice rituals of one community alone.

Her views on feminism and social issues were some thing that a number of people of her age group could never accept.   But she was  devoid of apology in her views about them.

She always felt that she need not lower herself or bend to cater to the needs of higher officials , no matter what the issue was.  She abhorred standing in front of higher officials for any favours even if she was justified in getting them.  She received the “Best Officer award this year 2015” and all her friends/acquaintences felt she was most deserving.  She hated using her health as an excuse for not performing her task.  She was punctual and self disciplined person with a very accommodating personality. She never could accept it if she was sidelined on account of her health . She was strong willed and determined to prove that she can do what needs to be done with no excuses at all.

As one of my friends rightly said she died the way she lived on her terms without troubling anybody be it family or friends and leaving a whole vacuum in our mind.

I will miss you Madam terribly -  your daily greeting in the morning – She was a warm affectionate humane friend whom I have lost and from whom I have learned a lot.  An ordinary woman who had extraordinary spirit  who taught me a lot on what determination is all about. Missing you Madam terribly. Lovingly yours.